Ad·dic·tion

Ad·dic·tion -noun
the state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or to something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming, as narcotics, to such an extent that its cessation causes severe trauma.

Hello, my name is Angela and I'm a food-a-holic.

Previously when I have tried to lose weight I have been successful for the short term. I eat smaller portions, I make better meal choices (1 cup of veggies, piece of lean meat, etc etc) and I lose weight... for a while. Throughout the entire "diet", "lifestyle change", etc. while I eat what I should and am successful (which helps to keep me on the path for a while) however, there is a little demon in my head that I fight with on a daily, hourly basis. I whole-heartedly believe that food addiction and addictions to other substances such as alcohol and cigarettes are all in the same category. If you have never had an addiction to any of those things, you will never understand. So no, I don't smoke nor do I drink often but I am CONSTANTLY plagued by the temptations the demon of food tells me about. I fight with the demon in my head saying that no I don't need to eat fast food or half a container of 7 layer Mexican dip with tortilla chips, I don't need to stop at Starbucks, I don't need to eat this chocolate bar, I don't need to.. you get the idea. Who generally wins the battles? Well I'd say it's probably 75%-25% with the demon in the lead. I think about it, I obsess about it. Your average person may get up to get a snack an grab an apple without thinking- not me, I FIGHT with myself to eat that apple when I would rather eat something else. So I try not to keep the other types of food in the house - that doesn't always work though. Sometimes the demon will even win and I end up in my car driving to get what I want. I can bring a can of vegetable soup to work for lunch and fight with myself to eat it and still end up sometimes eating macaroni & cheese from the deli next door.

So to those who don't believe food can be an addiction - I tell you that you are full of shit and probably have never been overweight in your life but you are welcome to your opinion.

You can walk to the drug store buy and by a box of patches to quit smoking but you can't just walk to the store and buy a patch that will tell you that you don't always need to eat, even when you aren't necessarily hungry and you don't need to eat bad foods that their are other choices. The LapBand is my "quit smoking patch" for my obesity problem. The Band will help me take control of that demon and make better decisions on what I eat since I can only eat a small amount. No longer will I be temporarily successful on a "diet", or "lifestyle change" only to have the demon take control of me and gain back the weight I lost and bring 10lbs of angry revenge with it.

So stick with me while I exorcise my demon!